Old Sweetness

For some reason, in that morning
He was not feeling bad in his usual way
He did not want his usual bitter medicine
He just wanted to know

If that old sweetness was really poisonous

He sited down on his ragged armchair
Felt every sore spot in his back aching
And extended his hand for his warm coffee,
Thinking that an extra spoon of sugar
Would be called for today

In his heart, he recalled the previous night
And felt a shard of the sadness he forgot in his youth
A shard of those naive feelings, those silly cravings
Those emotions he had long given up

He smiled a bit, laughing at himself

Somewhere in his heart, he felt glad to discover
That a bit of that hateful boy was still on his heart
That his apathy and cynicism, so painfully obtained
Still had not completely dried him inside

That he could still long for someone else`s warmth

So, thinking deeply about events that caused him this
He took a deep breath, felt his crushing heartbeat
And held them dearly in his being, hidden in a corner
So as to not let it become a weakness

So as not to let the sweetness become a poison

Lucas Rangel Lima